Wilkins: Look I have a pet parrot!

Wontkins: Does he drink Red Diamond Coffee!

Wilkins: Yes

Parrot: Squak Polly want a Red Diamond Coffee!


Wontkins: Hey taxi! What can I get a cup of instant coffee?

Wilkins: Jomar Instant?

Wontkins: No, Just any old kind!

(The taxi leaves)

Wontkins: Hey taxi! (x2)


Wilkins: You getting on the Community Coffee bandwagon?

Wontkins: Never.

(A bandwagon full of cheering people enters the frame and runs over Wontkins)

Wilkins: You either go with Community or you just don't go.

Money $13.98:

Wilkins: Did you check the jackpot winners list for Sohio?

Wontkins: Did I?!

Wilkins: I went to the Sohio store and checked the jackpot winners list for Sohio.

Close Shave:

Wontkins: Gimme a close shave.

Wilkins: Do you drink Community Coffee?

Wontkins: Never.

(Wilkins brandishes a huge razor.)

Wilkins: My friend, this is gonna be the closest shave you ever had.


Wontkins: Help!!!

Wilkins: Did you bring a loaf of Dugan's Bread?

Wontkins: No!

(Wilkins hands down the window and Wontkins downfalls and Wilkins hands up the window)

Wilkins: How about to drop down to the grocery store for some!

Just Checking

Wilkins: Do you drink La Touraine Coffee?

Wontkins: No I don't. why?

(Wilkins hits Wontkins with the stamp, leaving a check mark on him)

Wilkins: Just checking...

Plane Waitress:

(Wilkins dresses as a Waitress and Wontkins sit on the plane)

Wilkins: Want a delicious cup of Green Diamond Coffee Sir!

Wontkins: No thank, I have soda.

Wilkins: I told him he don’t drink Green Diamond Coffee on the plane!

When Pigs Fly:

(Wilkins and Wontkins dress as pigs on a plane flight)

Wilkins: When Pigs Fly, Won’t they try Deer Park Water on the plane?

Wontkins: What?

Wilkins: Here you go, A bottle of Deer Park Water!


Wontkins: Have anything to people who don't drink Kraml Milk?
Screenshot 2019-10-24-20-15-47 kindlephoto-219416203

Folgers Coffee - "Mallet"

Wilkins: Sure, Here you are friend.

(Wilkins whacks Wontkins with mallet)

Wilkins: And it won't cost you a cent!


Wilkins: No Housekeeping! You should cup on for Frank’s Red Soda!

Wontkins: Shut up I trying to house keep!

Wilkins: I told he Don’t drink Frank’s!

Chocolate Shortcake:

Wilkins: Want Green Diamond Coffee with your Chocolate Shortcake?

Wontkins: No I just Give a chocolate shortcake !


Wilkins: He won’t like a cup of Green Diamond Coffee to was it down!

New Soda:

Wilkins: I have a new soda, Frank’s Blue Nectar!

Wontkins: Where can I buy Frank’s

Wilkins: Listen to this

Announcer: Korty’s Grocery stores at Fairview Avenue are now featuring a 2 pound size bottle of Frank’s Blue Nectar!

Shower Hot:

(Wontkins is in showertub)

Wilkins: I like a shower with Deer Park Instant Water!

Wontkins: What?!?

Wilkins: It’s all about the Deer Park Water that won’t go into the hot!


(Wilkins and Wontkins dressed as king)

Wilkins: Want some White Diamond Instant Coffee with the king?

Wontkins: What?

Wilkins: It’s all about the White Diamond Coffee that have tea party with the princess!

Mallet (Folgers Coffee):

Wontkins: Got anything for people’s don’t drink Folger‘s Coffee?

Wilkins: Ok, Here you go friend.

(Mallet noises)

Wilkins: And It won’t cost you cent.

80 Days With La Touraine:

Wontkins: This thing's sinking. We'd better throw out that La Touaine Instant Coffee.

(Wilkins throws Wontkins out from the balloon)

Wilkins: Just me and La Touaine Instant for 80 whole days.

Everybody Likes Nash's:

Wilkins: Everybody likes Nash's Coffee!

Wontkins: Not everybody.

(Wilkins whacks Wontkins with the mallet)

Wilkins: Now everybody likes Nash's!

Why okay?

Wilkins: Want a cup of Wilkins Coffee?

Wontkins: I felt sad...

Wilkins: Why?

Wontkins: I don't drink Wilkins Coffee...

Wilkins: Well, you could have it.

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