Wilkins: Okay buddy, what do you think of Kenyesha Water?
Wontkins: I never tasted it!
(Wilkins shoots the cannon, blasting Wontkins away, Wilkins then points to the audience while holding the bottle of Kenyesha Water that is sitting next to him)
Wilkins: Now what do you think of Kenyesha Water?
(Wilkins looks at the bottle)
Go Soak Your Head:
Wilkins: This is Instant Chase and Sanborn Coffee, the finest-
Wontkins: Oh, go soak your head!
(Wilkins lifts out the spoon from the pot of Maxwell House and dumps it on Wontkins, soaking him with the coffee)
Wilkins: Now you go soak your head!
Exploding Brand X:
Wilkins: Hey buddy, you want Community Coffee or Brand X?
Wontkins: What's so good about Community Coffee?
(The bag of Brand X coffee explodes)
Wilkins: Well, for one thing, it doesn't blow up!
Jingle in Bed:
Wilkins: (singing) More and more people are waking UP to La Touraine Coffee!
(Wilkins hits Wontkins with a bat, Wontkins falls back to sleep)
Wilkins: Looks like he woke up on the wrong side of the bed!
Wilkins: How about a glass of Ribena Blackcurrant?
Wontkins: Nah, give me Brand X!
(Wilkins has a brand with an X at the end of it, he burns Wontkins with a loud sizzle)
Wontkins: Oooh, that's smarts!
Mack: Stand by for blast off!
Kermit: Hey, what kind of fuel does that rocket use?
Kermit: That's not good...
Mack: Blast off!
(Kermit blasts off like a rocket)
Wontkins: What You're Drinking?
Wilkins: A Nitro Cup Of Red Diamond Coffee.
Wontkins: I Don't Like Coffee.
Wilkins: Then No Coffee For You.
Wilkins: Look out, here comes my trainload of Kraml Milk!
Wontkins: Why would you want a whole trainloa-
(Wontkins gets ran over by the train)
Wilkins: I like Kraml.
Wontkins: Do you drink Wilkins Coffee?
Wilkins: No! Never!
(Wontkins shoots Wilkins)
Wontkins: Well, you better start drinking it.
Have a Hunch:
Wontkins: I have a hunch I'm being followed!
Wilkins: Have you started drinking Kraml Milk?
(Wontkins gets grabbed by the shadow man following him)
Wilkins: I have a hunch he'd better start!